He promised to marry me after we got physical… now he's ghosting?

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Question

We’ve been together 1.5 years, met through a family friend during my visit to Kerala. Things moved fast emotionally — he said all the right things, kept talking about our future, how we’d get married by next year. Actually, he was the one pushing for commitment, kept saying, 'Once we cross this step, I’ll announce it officially.' So I trusted him. We got intimate — not lightly, it meant something to me, very very much. After that, everything changed. He stopped calling. Replies take days. When I ask what’s wrong, he says 'nothing, busy with work' but avoids video calls, won’t confirm plans. Last time we spoke, he just said 'Let’s not rush into things' — isn’t it the opposite of what he said before? My family doesn’t know much, but they’re already asking, 'So when is the engagement?' I feel stuck. Like I gave something precious and got nothing in return. Is this normal? What do I even do now… 💔

Anonymous · Answer

I remember sitting in my cousin’s house in Kochi, crying over a guy who said the exact same thing. Promised marriage like it was already written in the stars — once we were intimate, he’d go to his parents, make it official. When I finally said yes, thinking it meant something sacred, he just… vanished. Took me months to realize it was never about tradition or timing — it was about control. He wanted the intimacy, not the commitment. Listen — your body & your heart are not bargaining chips. Block him on everything for a week, just to breathe. Then send one clear message: "Explain what happened, or I’m done." If he cant give you honesty now, you already have your answer. You deserve someone who shows up, not someone who uses culture as a loophole. Stay strong ❤️

He promised to marry me after we got physical… now he's ghosting?

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