I want to leave Singapore but she won’t go

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Question

I just turned 28 and feel stuck. Since young, my parents insisted on early marriage, so I married my wife at 24. Everything was arrange — not love, more like family duty. Now I’m suffocating. I’ve been saving quietly to move to Canada. My cousin there says I can stay with him, work in construction, start clean. But my wife… her whole family is here. Her father even gave her a hawker stall, which she runs well. She says she cannot make it anywhere else. I told her I’m not happy, but she just cries and says I’m being selfish. Part of me confirms that. I mean, is it so wrong to want air? I checked our kundli long ago — pandit said mismatch in Nibha Nibhi, warned of separation. I laughed then. Now I wonder. Maybe stars knew what I didn’t. I don’t hate her. But every day feels heavier. How do I choose without destroying everything?

Anonymous · Answer

I was in a similiar situation, married young to please my family, but honestly it wasnt working out for me, I felt trapped. What helped me was having an open conversation with my partner, I told her how I felt, we talked about our dreams & what we wanted from life. I think you should try that, have a real talk with your wife, not just about leaving but about why you're unhappy, maybe theres a compromise, like taking a break from singapore together or something. My cousin moved to canada too, he said its tough at first but worth it, so I'm sure you'll figure it out... just gotta take that first step

I want to leave Singapore but she won’t go

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