My partner says all our fights are my mental health's fault

my partner used to do the same thing — anytime we argued, it was because I was ‘too sensitive’ or my depression was ‘spiking’ she’d say it like it canceled out anything I felt. took me way too long to realize: just ‘cause I have anxiety doesn’t mean every boundary or need is a symptom. what helped? I started naming it in the moment. like when she said I was being controlling, I said ‘this isn’t my anxiety — this is me asking for connection. your response is what’s harsh.’ kept it simple. no blame, just facts. also started texting after fights instead of waiting for her to re-engage. like ‘hey, last night sucked. I still feel shut out. can we talk in the morning?’ gave her space but didn’t disappear. she finally went to a couples session after I said I’d keep trying therapy but I needed her in one session to hear me. she cried, realized she’d been using my diagnosis to avoid accountability. not saying that’ll happen but boundaries + calm persistence changed everything also? if she keeps doing this after you’ve said it clearly — idk maybe she’s not ready to show up right.