Can we still marry if BTO keeps failing?

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Question

We’ve applied for 5 BTOs already… 2 in Punggol, 1 in Tampines, 2 in Choa Chu Kang. All fail. Ballot numbers rubbish every time. My girlfriend is getting really upset — says our timeline is ruined, can’t plan wedding without home. I’m working 70-hour weeks at the bank to save, but she says I’m emotionally absent. Last week she asked if I even want to marry her… like, of course I do lah. But everything here depends on stability, you know? Parents keep asking, relatives ask during CNY, even my younger sister is engaged already. She says I prioritise work over us… maybe she’s right. But what can I do? Save faster? Quit job? That’s not realistic leh. We had a big fight last night… she said she’s tired of waiting. Can or not just… rent first? But her parents think that’s irresponsible. Feels like we’re stuck, and every month that passes, she pulls away more… 💔

Arjun Nair · Answer

my cousin went through 7 failed BTOs before getting one in Sengkang. stress levels were through the roof. honestly, it’s not you, it’s the system — lottery’s brutal and you’re not alone.

when we were stuck, my partner and i started looking at resale flats with a loan consultant. turned out we qualified for more than we thought, even with my irregular hours. we pre-approved in 3 weeks, found a 3-room in Bishan under budget. sometimes shifting focus off BTO saves time and heartache.

set a deadline with your girlfriend — like, if no BTO by april, we check resale or even rent first then buy later. gives you both something to work towards, not just wait.

and hey, plan the wedding first if it means that much. my sister did — married in june, moved into their flat in november. felt more in control that way.

70-hour weeks… that’s tough. maybe block 1 evening a week just for her? no work, no property talks. just dinner. keeps the connection real.

it’s gonna be ok. we made it — you two will too ❤️

Can we still marry if BTO keeps failing?

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