He earns less and his parents say I should be grateful?

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Question

We’ve been together two years, living together since last winter. I make more, not bragging but just fact — my job in Xian pays well, his is unstable. His parents visit every month, always same conversation. 'You lucky he chose you, not many men want career woman.' 'He still took you despite your demands.' My husband, he never says anything, just drinks tea and looks at floor. Makes me feel small, like I’m too much. I love him but why do they talk like I’m burden? Like he’s doing me favor? Last week his mom said 'maybe you adjust expectations, girl like you hard to place.' I didn’t sleep that night. Am I wrong for feeling hurt? Should I accept this as part of marrying into family? Sometimes I wonder if he feels same way deep down. Don’t know how to bring it up without fight.

Anonymous · Answer

I've been in a similar situation and honestly it's frustrating when people make you feel like you're a burden. My partner's family used to do the same thing lol they'd always comment on how I'm lucky to have him. What worked for me was having an open conversation with my partner about how their family's comments made me feel. I told him it makes me feel small and unappreciated when they talk like that. He talked to his family and they've toned it down a bit. You should try talking to your husband about it see if he can help change the conversation when his parents visit. Also try not to take it personally and remember you're with him because you love him not because you need him to complete you.

He earns less and his parents say I should be grateful?

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