He promised to come back after 2 years… it's been 5

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Question

We were together before he went to Saudi for work. Said he’ll be back in two years, we even had a small blessing from the church, like, almost na kami. But it’s been five. Five years, and all I get is an occasional text when his phone has load. No calls. No visits. Last month, my cousin saw his photo on FB — with a woman and a kid. Same surname. I dont know if I should still wait or if I’ve been stupid all this time. My lola keeps saying, 'Ang tibay mo naman, Renato,' but it’s super hard every time I pass by that sari-sari store we planned to open. Feels like I’m stuck. And my wife… she wants me to move to Davao City, live near the kids, but how can I start over if I still check his profile every damn night? Part of me thinks he’s coming back. The other part knows he already did — just not to me.

Anonymous · Answer

My tita waited 7 years for a man who never came back — same story, different country. I used to think patience was romantic, but now I see it can just be self-harm in disguise. You’re not stupid, but you’ve given enough. Five years with crumbs? That’s not love, that’s convenience for him.

I know it hurts — I’ve cried over fake promises too. But check: if he wanted to come back, he would’ve. Even with no load, love finds a way. The fact that he’s building a life there & didn’t even tell you? That’s your answer, not a text when his phone’s charged.

Here’s what I did when I realized I was holding on to ghost: I wrote a letter (didn’t send it) saying everything I felt. Then I burned it. Not because it fixed anything, but because it made me feel free. Try that. Then, block him everywhere. Cold. Not to punish him — for you.

You deserve someone who chooses you, not someone you beg to stay. Lola might say you’re strong, but sometimes strength means walking away. Do it now, before your heart breaks harder.

He promised to come back after 2 years… it's been 5

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