How do I leave when they threaten self-harm?
We've been together 3 years, and I told her I can't marry without a house — my family will be shame if I bring wife home to live with parents. She said she doesn't care, but then when I said maybe we should stop, she cried and said she'd cut herself. I don't want to make him shame but I'm so stuck. I cannot say directly but... I've already been seeing someone else, just to feel free for once. She found out, screamed, then sent me a photo of her wrist with a small cut. I feel like a monster for causing that, but also — I'm drowning. We live in Hanoi, my parents ask every week when wedding is. Every time they ask, I feel like I failed. She says if I leave, she won't eat, she'll make herself sick. I keep staying, but I wake up empty. I don't know if I'm the bad one or just trapped. Part of me hopes she'll let go, but she won't. How do you leave when the person uses pain like that?