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Long Distance

My partner wants to close the distance but I am not ready to move

We have been LDR for 2 years. My partner wants me to move to their city to finally be together. But I have a great job, a support network, and roots here. They refuse to move because of their own career. It feels like an ultimatum: move or we are done. Is this fair?

advice-needed

Asked by

Frank Chen

5 rep

March 9, 2026

522 views

1 answer

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Key Takeaways

After 2 years of LDR, someone has to move or you have to accept the situation permanently.

1 Answer

Best Answer
Grace Kim
5 rep
March 9, 2026
After 2 years of LDR, someone has to move or you have to accept the situation permanently. That is just the math of distance. It is not "unfair" for them to want resolution — the question is whether the framing is a discussion or a demand. Both of you have valid reasons to stay. But the relationship needs ONE of you to sacrifice — and that decision should come from who has MORE to gain by moving and LESS to lose. Approach it as a joint problem to solve, not a power struggle.

My partner wants to close the distance but I am not ready to move

advice-needed

Asked by

Frank Chen

5 rep

March 9, 2026

522 views

1 answer

Get Notified

Want to know what others say? Get new answers in your inbox — no account needed.

Your email is only used for this notification. We won't spam you.

Key Takeaways

After 2 years of LDR, someone has to move or you have to accept the situation permanently.

1 Answer

Best Answer
Grace Kim
5 rep
March 9, 2026
After 2 years of LDR, someone has to move or you have to accept the situation permanently. That is just the math of distance. It is not "unfair" for them to want resolution — the question is whether the framing is a discussion or a demand. Both of you have valid reasons to stay. But the relationship needs ONE of you to sacrifice — and that decision should come from who has MORE to gain by moving and LESS to lose. Approach it as a joint problem to solve, not a power struggle.

My partner wants to close the distance but I am not ready to move

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My partner wants to close the distance but I am not ready to move

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