She said she loved me then shut down overnight

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Question

We were doing okay, actually. Like, not perfect, but we’d been together 8 months and she told me she loved me out of nowhere one night after dinner. I’m already 28 so when she said it, I let myself believe things could get serious. We even talked about introducing her to my parents soon. Then, literally the next week, she stopped texting first, wouldn’t meet up, and when I asked if everything was okay, she just said ‘I need space’ like it’s nothing. I think our situation is crazy-making. One minute she’s all in, next I’m being treated like a stranger. I don’t even know if it’s me or something at work or — is it astrology? We’re both Virgos, maybe too much friction? Or did I mess up by assuming she meant it seriously? In Korea, people don’t say ‘I love you’ lightly, right? So if she said it, I thought it meant something real. Now I’m just stuck waiting and overthinking everything. 🤦‍♂️

George Dela Cruz · Answer

So i’ve been there, man. My wife—well, ex now—did something similar back when we were young. One minute we’re talking about forever, next she won’t even pick up the phone. Like, what even happened? I kept calling, texting, trying to fix whatever broke, but she just kept saying she needed space. What i learned the hard way: when someone pulls back like that, it’s not about you. It’s about something inside them they don’t know how to say out loud.

I used to chase. Very very hard. But what helped me most was stepping back and actually giving her the space—no calls, no check-ins. Crazy thing? It either clears the air… or shows you it was never clear to begin with.

Don’t beg. Don’t camp out in her DMs. Live your life. If she wants to come back, she will—but only if it’s real. And if she doesn’t? You’ll already be on your feet. 💪

She said she loved me then shut down overnight

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