Why does she go silent for days over small stuff?

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Question

so my girl’s a Cancer & I’m a Sag, we’ve been long-distance since I moved back to McAllen to help with abuela after surgery. she’s in Seattle. lately if i don’t text first or i forget to mention i had a late shift at the shop, she’ll go completely quiet—like, no reply for 3 or 4 days. when i ask what’s wrong, she says i ‘hurt her’ by not caring enough, but i didn’t even know it was a big deal. my tía says in relationships back home, women don’t always say what’s wrong, they expect you to just *know*, but that never flew with me. i’m trying, but it feels like walking on eggshells. last time this happened i called her mom to make sure abuela was okay (she is), & she thought we broke up already. i don’t wanna play games. she says i’m too blunt, i say she’s not fair. is this just how Cancers are or am i missing something? idk maybe she wants me to move up there but money’s tight right now & familia comes first

idk maybe she wants me to move up there but money’s tight right now & familia comes first

Anonymous · Answer

my ex was a Cancer too & man did she run hot and cold. drove me nuts at first but i learned a few things. they feel everything deep, like tiny stuff hits different. it’s not really about the text or the shift it’s about feeling safe & seen. my move? i started sending a quick voice note before bed even if it was just 'hey baby, just got off, thinking of u' — took 20 seconds but changed everything. also when she went quiet i stopped asking 'what’s wrong' and tried warm assuming — like 'i got you mixed up in my head today, missed your smile' instead of pressing. felt weird at first but she started coming back faster. you’re not failing, y’all just speak love different. keep showing up, but show up in her language. little things that feel over the top to you? that’s the stuff that sticks for them

Why does she go silent for days over small stuff?

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